Until you love your family without conditions, self-love is not a possibility, and therefore your Work isn’t done.
If you want to alienate your friends and family, go around saying, “Is it true?” or “Turn it around” when they haven’t asked you for help. You may need to do that for a while, in order to hear it for yourself.
The Work of Byron Katie
We buy a home for our children, for our bodies; we get a garage for our car; we have doghouses for our dogs; but we won’t give the mind a home. We treat it like an outcast. We shame it and blame it and shame it again. But if you let the mind ask its questions, then the heart will reveal the answers. Then the mind can finally rest at home in the heart and come to see that it and the heart are one.
The advice you’ve been giving your family and friends turns out to be advice for you to live, not us. You become the wise teacher as you become a student of yourself. Byron Katie
At some point, you may want to go to the deepest suffering inside you and clear it up. Do The Work until you see your part in that suffering. And then go to the people you’ve judged, and apologize; tell them what you’ve seen about yourself and how you’re working on it now. It’s all up to you. Speaking these truths is what sets you free. Byron Katie
The Work of Byron Katie
If you’re yelling within you that they shouldn’t yell at you, that is where the pain begins, not with their yelling at you. You’re arguing with reality, and you lose.
The Work of Byron Katie
If you don’t attach beliefs to it, sex is just like breathing or walking. It’s beauty; it’s you. But when you go into it seeking things like satisfaction, ecstasy, intimacy, connectedness, and romance, don’t count on finding them.
The quality of everything we do: our physical actions, our verbal actions, and even our mental actions, depends on our motivation. That’s why it’s important for us to examine our motivation in our day to day life. If we cultivate respect for others and our motivation is sincere, if we develop a genuine concern for others’ well-being, then all our actions will be positive.
”we each have a reason to be, something within us that allows us to believe that hope is real and peace is possible; these truths begin with an attitude. that is, while the facts of your life may not be your choice, the attitude with which you deal with those facts IS entirely your choice, and therein lies your capacity to make a meaningful difference in the world, to leave behind an echo and a silhouette that can gently and beautifully shape the future.” ♥
Warm-heartedness reinforces our self-confidence – giving us not a blind confidence, but a sense of confidence based on reason. When you have that you can act transparently, with nothing to hide! Likewise, if you are honest, the community will trust you. Trust brings friendship, as a result of which you can always feel happy. Whether you look to the right or the left, you will always be able to smile. Dalai Lama
The many factors which divide us are actually much more superficial than those we share. Despite all of the things that differentiate us – race, language, religion, gender, wealth and so on – we are all equal concerning our fundamental humanity.
Affection and a calm mind are important to us. A calm mind is good for our physical health, but it also enables us to use our intelligence properly and to see things more realistically. Affection too is important because it counters anger, hatred and suspicion that can prevent our minds from functioning clearly.
Whoever we feel hurt us is actually standing in front of us asking for love. Their behavior is not where they’re bad but where they’re wounded, and the only way out of our pain is to bless them and appreciate them for what they did right.
When we let others off the hook of our trying to control what they do, we’re released from the hook of obsessively caring what they do.
The ego is like a scavenger dog, always on the lookout for evidence of someone’s guilt. The Spirit is on the lookout too, for evidence of their innocence and beauty. Whichever evidence we believe, we will believe about ourselves.
The egoic, fear-based thinking of the world falls like a veil in front of our eyes, obscuring what is real and confusing our thoughts. Yet this veil of illusion is automatically removed when we remember who we are. We are love. We are here to love and be loved. Nothing else is real.
Forgiveness is a selective remembering, in which we keep all the love that was ever given us and all the love that we ever gave. Let all the rest go into the nothingness from whence it came, and nothing but love will remain.
Any day you consciously dedicate to love, asking only to be used as its instrument, is a day in which fear has less of a grip on your psyche. Love casts out fear the way light casts out darkness; in the presence of one the other is gone. Marianne Williamson
Louise L. Hay
If you have ever untangled a ball of string, you know that yanking and pulling only makes it worse. You need to very gently and patiently unravel the knots. Be gentle and patient with yourself as you untangle your own mental knots, and love yourself in the process. Willingness to let go of the old is the key.
It is the thesis of the great psychoanalyst Victor Frankl that man can endure any hardship as long as he can find meaning in the experience. Incidentally, as a survivor of Nazi Concentration Camps he was in a position to know. Thankfully, most of us are not tested in such extreme conditions. However, the principle is the same. Human beings cannot live without meaning. Depression is the natural outcome of living a life that is bereft of purpose.
”people will hate you, rate you, shake you, and break you. but how strong you stand is what makes you. what others think about you is none of your business. so remain positive, be HONEST with yourself, and ALWAYS move forward.” ♥
Send love to every part of your body, even down to your fingertips! Here’s an affirmation to say for your fingers: My fingers give me much pleasure. I love my ability to touch and feel, to probe and inspect, to mend and repair, to create, and to fashion with love. I put my finger on the pulse of life; and I am in tune with every person, place, and thing. I choose the thoughts that enable me to touch with love. I love and appreciate my beautiful fingers! Louise Hay
Louise L. Hay
The very person you find it hardest to forgive is the one you need to let go of the most. Forgiveness means letting go. It has nothing to do with condoning behavior, it’s just letting the whole thing go. We do not have to know how to forgive. All we need to do is be willing to forgive. The Universe will take care of the hows.
Louise L. Hay
Be committed to the relationship you have with yourself. We get so committed to other relationships, but we sort of toss ourselves away. We get around to ourselves only now and then. So, really care for who you are. Take care of your heart and soul. Let’s all share ideas on little ways we can do good for ourselves every day.
Support yourself by making the right choices for you. When in doubt, ask yourself, “Is this a decision that is loving for me? Is this right for me now?” You may make another decision at some later point, a day, a week, or a month later. But ask yourself these questions in each moment. Louise L. Hay
Louise L. Hay
Forgiveness opens our hearts to self-love. Being unwilling to forgive is a terrible thing to do to ourselves. Bitterness is like swallowing a teaspoon of poison every day. It accumulates and harms us. It’s impossible to be healthy and free when we keep ourselves bound to the past. The incident is over. Perhaps long over. Let it go. Allow yourself to be free. Affirm: I give myself permission to let go.
EVERYTHING THAT HUMAN BEINGS FEEL “While we are sitting in meditation, we are simply exploring humanity and all of creation in the form of ourselves. We can become the world’s greatest experts on anger, jealousy, and self-deprecation, as well as on joyfulness, clarity, and insight. Everything that human beings feel, we feel. We can become extremely wise and sensitive to all of humanity and the whole universe simply by knowing ourselves, just as we are.” (Wisdom of No Escape)
”We know that all is impermanent; we know that everything wears out. Although we can buy this truth intellectually, emotionally we have a deep-rooted aversion to it. We want permanence; we expect permanence. Our natural tendency is to seek security; we believe we can find it. We experience impermanence at the everyday level as frustration. We use our daily activity as a shield against the fundamental ambiguity of our situation, expending tremendous energy trying to ward off impermanence and death. We don’t like it that our bodies change shape. We don’t like it that we age. We are afraid of wrinkles and sagging skin. We use health products as if we actually believe that OUR skin, OUR hair, OUR eyes and teeth, might somehow miraculously escape the truth of impermanence.” (The Places That Scare You)
WHAT ARE WE PRACTICING? ”The painful thing is that when we buy into disapproval, we are practicing disapproval. When we buy into harshness, we are practicing harshness. The more we do it, the stronger these qualities become. How sad it is that we become so expert at causing harm to ourselves and others. The trick then is to practice gentleness and letting go. We can learn to meet whatever arises with curiosity and not make it such a big deal.” (When Things Fall Apart)
THE PERFECTION OF PATIENCE ”Patience is not learned in safety. It is not learned when everything is harmonious and going well. When everything is smooth sailing, who needs patience? If you stay in your room with the door locked and the curtains drawn, everything may seem harmonious, but the minute anything doesn’t go your way, you blow up. There is no cultivation of patience when your pattern is to just try to seek harmony and smooth everything out. Patience implies willingness to be alive rather than trying to seek harmony.” (The Pocket Pema)
HOW TO DEFEAT FEAR
Once there was a young warrior. Her teacher told her that she had to do battle with fear. She didn’t want to do that. It seemed too aggressive; it was scary; it seemed unfriendly. But the teacher said she had to do it and gave instructions for the battle. The day arrived. The student warrior stood on one side, and fear stood on the other. The warrior was feeling very small, and fear was looking big and wrathful. The young warrior roused herself and went toward fear, prostrated three times, and asked, “May I have permission to go into battle with you?” Fear said, “Thank you for showing me so much respect that you ask permission.” Then the young warrior said, “How can I defeat you?” Fear replied, “My weapons are that I talk fast, and I get very close to your face. Then you get completely unnerved, and you do whatever I say. If you don’t do what I tell you, I have no power. You can listen to me, and you can have respect for me. You can even be convinced by me. But if you don’t do what I say, I have no power.”
Wayne W. Dyer
Revenge, anger, and hatred are exceedingly low energies that keep you from matching up with the attributes of the universal force. A simple thought of forgiveness toward anyone who might have angered you in the past will raise you to the level of Spirit and aid you in your individual intentions. Forgiveness is really an act of letting go. We can do this letting go without even encountering the person we want to forgive. This is one of the most healing things you can do.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie
“It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.” – Alan Cohen
“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” – Dr. Seuss
Empower Family Relationships by Eliminating Stress and Drama 10-11 AM EDT